The Weekend Marriage

by Chris Garner
Couples often marry thinking that the feelings of love and the enjoyment of being with each other will never change. Thirty one years ago, my wife asked me, ‘This is never going to change, right?’ I quickly answered, ‘Never, we will always be in love like this.’ We were so naïve! The busyness of life hit like a freight train and it did change. Work, children, family, friends, ministry – there was no time left for “us.” We connected when we could, which was very rarely. It became a “weekend” marriage; scurrying through the week with a whirlwind of activities and then trying to connect with limited time on the weekend. Where did the feelings of love go? Blown down the way with that whirlwind of activity!
Too often today, the marriage relationship is not the priority in people’s lives. We take care of everything and everyone else and think that the marriage will just be there, no matter what. The marriage relationship becomes the most neglected part of our lives and then we wonder why there are no feelings of love, no desire for each other. Or, one day, one spouse or the other announces that he or she is done with the relationship and is leaving. Slack-jawed, one spouse cannot believe his or her ears. ‘Leaving? Why would you do that?’ As one man in this position told me, “Chris, we haven’t worked on our marriage for two years.” They had a weekend marriage, did not connect with each other and his wife found connection somewhere else.
Connection and intimacy in marriage requires time and energy. As with anything in life, if you put little into it, you will get little out of it. Couples must make the time to connect with each other on a daily basis. There is no easy answer to the problem of making time for your marriage. Every couple is different, but I am here to tell you that if you commit together to work at connecting, you can develop intimacy and closeness in spite of the busyness of our world today. You must work on your marriage and avoid the trap of the “weekend marriage” – it is worth the effort, for both you and your children!
Fortified Marriages Ministry
Phone: 480-699-2515
E-mail: info@fortifiedmarriages.com
Website: www.fortifiedmarriages.com