Men; Love Your Children’s Mother
by Chris Garner
A noted theologian once stated; “The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” It is incredibly important that fathers demonstrate Godly love for their children’s mother and too often today, men do not love their wives as they should. Their children don’t see love and respect from their father, but too often see impatience, disrespect and even abuse of their mother. Men, the scars left in children who grow up in this kind of environment are detrimental to the children and follow them for life. Men have a profound impact on their children and it will be either positive or negative. One way to help make it a positive impact is by loving their children’s mother. This means demonstrating respect for her, honor her; treat her as if she were a princess. As we see in Philippians 2, we have to set aside our own selfish desires, humble ourselves and put our wives’ needs before our own. Difficult? It is impossible without God’s help, so we must first surrender our lives to Christ and he will empower us to be the husband and father God wants us to be.
I know that in today’s society it may not even be possible to show “love” to your child’s mother. She may live somewhere else; perhaps in another state or even in another country or you may just wish she was in another country, somewhere appropriate like Antarctica. The state of the relationship may be beyond repair, but you can do what is right and treat your children’s mother with respect whenever you have contact with her even if she treats you badly. She may even lie and tell your children terrible things about you. Act honorably and the children will eventually realize who was true and who wasn’t. Again, you cannot do this on your own strength, but God can empower you to express His selfless love for your children’s mother.
Men, we live in an age of incredible selfishness. One’s individual rights and well-being tend to be the highest ideal. We can make a difference beginning with those we love the most – our children. When we die to self and put others’ interests before our own, our children will see a difference modeled that I believe they will want to follow. It starts with the person next to you – your wife. Or if your children’s mother does not live with you; you still can treat her with dignity and respect. I am studying The Christian Husband with a group of guys and the author suggests that men are to be protective of all women. Can you imagine the change in our society if men in general treated all women with dignity and respect and sought to protect women as if they were our mothers or sisters or daughters? You may not be able to change all of society, but you can change your own ways – love your children’s mother as God would want you to love her.
Fortified Marriages Ministry
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